I’ve decided I should not blog on bad days. Today seems like a pretty good day so therefore I will update you. Things with baby S seem to be getting better, not worse. Horray for that! She sleeps way more than C ever did and the fussiness as been getting less and less since I wrote my last post the other day. So, that’s good news. And, she is way cute so that makes everything better, right? hee hee.
Anyway, I’ll admit that I did a horrible job in reading the assigned chapters for Book Review Friday this week. Every day I would go to bed thinking, “Oops, didn’t get to it today. I’ll find time tomorrow” and so I just read Matthew 5-7 for the first time this week a few minutes ago. Sad, I know. Since I’m such a slacker, this doesn’t qualify as a review but I do have one or two things I might like to say.
Ok, so basically as I started chapter 5 and we dove right into the sermon on the mount and the Beatitudes, I began to see that I have much work to do…all the time. Seriously, where have I gone wrong? How did I get so far from where I should be? It’s discouraging that I keep trodding my way back to a certain point closer to the Lord and then fall away to where I was before. What the heck am I doing? I really don’t know.
The next thing that poked me (I guess that poke is conviction, eh?) was chapter 6:32-34. Beside this passage, I had made a tiny note in 2004, the summer I worked as a camp cousellor at Truth for Youth Bible camp (you know, before I had kids and seemed to have actual time on my hands), anyway, beside the tiny note was a happy face. And I remember making that happy face like it was yesteday. How could that be 4 years ago?? I was happy because I trusted the Lord that summer for every single need I had and every single worry that I had. And worries I had alot of. I’ve aways been an anxious person. I worry about everything. all the time. But some how, I let the Lord look after it all as I made the kingdom of God my primary concern and it was the most peaceful few months I’ve ever had. I really wish I could get back to that level of trust in God. Sigh.
My worries are a little (or alot) different these days but often they take over my entire thought life. This is not good and not healthy for me. It’s wearing me down.
So there is my non-review. I’ll probably link it anyway because Shannon will make me 🙂